Staring at an empty screen I wonder what it is that I need to say. Do I want to talk about work, or relationships, or my Mom? Mom wins.
The second-best case scenario of what is happening to Mom is a disease called Lewy Body Dementia. It travels in the same circles as Alzheimer’s disease and Parkinson’s disease. I say the second-best case for one simple reason, I hope that the cause for what she is going through lies in her medication. But deep down I know that is not the case. Her medication has changed and yet she still suffers.
She is so hard on herself. She wonders why she can not remember. She becomes frustrated that she does the opposite of what she wants to accomplish. Her short-term memory is deteriorating. It is surreal. Yet, her stories of times past are vivid, filled with love and humor. Once again she is my story teller. She has never been one to exaggerate the truth, so I listen knowing that all I hear is real. Stories I have heard before have become my lifeline. I need to hear them.
As always she is beautiful, and kind. She hates to be a burden. I tell her she will never be one. I am grateful that I have her. When I call her and she remembers how to use the phone, I know it is a wonderful day. When she forgets, I teach her how to use it. In that moment when it comes back to her, all is good in the world. Little victories.