Freedom in Writing
Freedom is such an interesting word. I know that I am fascinated
by the concept of freedom. To have the ability to say, and do as you please is surreal.
What is freedom? That is a huge question, so I will break it down by focusing
on a tiny aspect: the ability to write and publish how you truly feel. I know that when I write I am handcuffed by
so many factors. I am a mother, a wife,
a daughter, a cousin, a niece, an ex wife, a friend, and an employee. Each
role brings with it responsibilities that are immense. When I
write, I am conscious of each word that I type out. I often wonder if who I am, and what I write
will ever form a cohesive relationship.
I will be the first to admit that I fight against much of what I
know to be instinctual. In doing so I ensure that I am always three steps back
from where I should be in my life. Yet,
I continue to fight, resist and procrastinate. Then I have the audacity to
wonder why I do not feel free. It really is a senseless situation that I
create. I know that writing is a refuge. Communication with those I trust is a
refuge. Taking care of those I love is a refuge. Creativity is my refuge.
Freedom in writing is to bare your soul, unleash your truth,
express your failures, while using language that is natural to you. This takes a courage that I have yet to cultivate.
I am a work in progress, where freedom to write in my truth, is still far out
of reach. But I know that I will reach it.
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